Law, a student problem

There are enough relatable memes circulating my Facebook feed about Law Student Problems. So. Many. We're trying to make the suffering bearable, puns aplenty and complaints about case law. We all are bracing ourselves for that inevitable moment of hopelessness with tests looming and assignments needing endless footnotes( Harvard In-Text Wins: Always).  

{that was a little nod to the (amazing) referencing system that wasn't devised by the devil himself- I said that to my history lecturer who did not look impressed. Footnotes are needy.} 

I currently am writing this on a coffee break between summaries, so forgive the bitter edge to my compilation of Law Student Problems... And believe me there are many. 

I have time for five. 

1) Legal Latin, or, Does Pig Latin Count for a Half Mark? 

My most recent Google search queries involve searching for a way to get my word processor to recognise the Latin phrases I type into my notes. Words get swapped out, plurals get corrected to the previously learned singular version. I just want Windows and Apple to have an Add Legal Latin option under languages. It's a simple request from a woman who just wants to stop having possession everywhere instead of possessorium, to finally type out inter alia and not have Inter Aliens come up immediately. 

My memory fails me on the language front because in a test, when presented with the aforementioned Latin phrases, I start thinking about the following: 

Momento Mori - Remember you must die. ( Highly likely if this kind of thing happens again) (But it is a way out of doing that killer essay for next month if the Grim Reaper decides to take me now) 

Carpe Diem - Seize the day, I think as I seize the question paper and underline something for no reason other than it looks like an important part... It's usually the page number 

Mea Culpa - Through my fault, my fault indeed for not doing the Legal Latin elective in first year that I ignored in favour of Criminology which served to only inform me about the high crime rates in recent years. 

Veni Vidi Vici- I came, I saw, I conquered.... The past paper just before this test so I should be ok for Question 3 right??

Quid pro quo - Something for something, or Me trying to remember what happened in the case where the judge said something and the textbook said something else and the lecturer said we need to remember something about those somethings to pass his course. 

Pro Bono- For the public good. Would it be in the interests of the public if I ended up with a degree?? 

2) Not all heroes wear capes, some write case summaries

I need to take this oppurtunity to thank all the long suffering authors who summarise case law down to little chunks that bring up all the important points of a case, so we don't have to scan 170 pages to get three sentences that are applicable to the study unit we're studying. 

Lecturers who include specific paragraphs and talk about the important aspects of the case get an honourable mention as well. 

If a tree falls in the forest, is there any precedent to suggest that it may have made a sound? Does the legal tradition accept that a falling tree can make a sound? Cross out paragraph 11.3.4 which deals with the judgement on falling trees in urban areas because of course we all heard it that one time. 

3) The Interdependence of a Study Group: An Ode 

Law students are the kindest people*

Strangers in the law library have given me study tips because they saw the textbook I was using, notes circulate with generosity and if you have gracious, wonderful friends (I love you guys)- your inbox is filled with helpful notes and past papers. Someone tweeted a Dropbox full of notes recently.  It's a shared anguish, a shared struggle and the dynamic is astounding. 

Also the puns on a Whatsapp group the night before a test: Comedy Gold. 

*Ok there are some bad apples, the ones who are there to kick ass, alienate people and get a job at all the firms by First Year... They're slightly terrifying. They will cut a b**** and not hold the lift when they see you running towards it. Hate y'all. And am assured the feeling is mutual.

4) Decimating your soul: A module 

Am I the only one who started studying law with a wish to save the poor, carry the flag of the silenced and kick some criminal butt? 

Because, now in my third year I want to be a cold corporate lawyer far from divorces and distanced from the harsh realities of crime (Thanks Criminology). I mean I still want to save the whales and dismantle the patriarchy but I regularly feel so wistful at the hopelessness of it all. That the way a lot of our legal system is structured, lends favour to some groups and that what is morally right isn't necessarily always what the outcome of a judgment is. 

I've got too much of a heart, I think. I think a lot of us have the best intentions going in but seeing how much is still wrong with the world that the law can't fix- it is terrifying. 

5) Closing Arguments 

The closer to the end of your degree you get, the more people want to know your Five Year Plan. Where do you want to do articles? Where do you want to work? What did you think of the Oscar trial? 

And also people who have no inclination towards crime like saying, "I'll know who to call if I'm in jail" to you, with a nudge and a wink. No Barb, I will not be the one to call if the police raid your bridge party and arrest you, for some reason. 

I'm just trying to prepare for my exams, make lists of Latin phrases I will have trouble remembering and figure out electives for next year when I truly make the plunge in deciding a path for myself. I can't see anything more than the page in front of me with test dates and post-its to remind me to get articles for my essay on feminism and notifications on my phone that tell me that my time is up for writing a blog post and that I have to get back to Chapter 17. 

We're all just trying. And if one day, that can help someone in some way- it seems worth it.  

(Essential Disclaimer: None of the pictures here belong to me, but to the Google Overlords and the creators of aforementioned memes)